Dr. Wal Mart

[Big John]

A guy was complaining to his buddies at work about a
pain in his arm, centering at the elbow. "Guess I'll
have to make a Dr.'s appointment", he said. One of
his workers said "Don't do that before you try the
Walmart machine. All you do is dump a small cup of
pee into it, and it'll diagnose the problem". So, off
to Walmart he goes with his bottle of pee, dumps it in
the top and pushes the enter button. The machine
humms and some lights blink, then with a chime a paper
slip pops out. "You have tennis elbow. Apply ice,
take a pain pill and avoid stressing the arm for a
week". The guy goes home and thinks it over, then
decides to have some fun with the machine. He gets
his wife and daughter to pee into the bottle, pees
into it himself, and for good measure mixes some dog
poo into it all, He goes to the machine and dumps it
in. Lights blink and it takes awhile but finally the
bell rings and the paper spits out.

"Your daughter has a cocaine habit: send her to a
rehabilitation center. Your wife is pregnant, it's
not yours. Your dog has ringworm, send him to the
vet, and if you don't quit jerking off so much you'll
never get rid of that tennis elbow. Have a nice day
and thank you for shopping at Walmart"